This is a letter to you. Yes my love, YOU.
Because I see you, I feel you, I hear you.
We all have our inner battles, we all feel alone sometimes, or feel like no one really gets what we go through. And going through cancer, but maybe even more so during the aftermath, these feelings and experiences can be more present than ever.
Maybe you feel the pressure of expectations and the will to live up to them. Whether by yourself, others (or both), the expectation that you ‘should be’ so happy and excited that you’ve finished treatments and can move on with your life. ‘Onwards and upwards with the most positive spirit ever!’. Right?
I know that you are deeply grateful that you are still here, that you get to live a new life chapter. But at the same time, there might be all this fear inside you of not being able to do it all. Fear of not having enough energy or the cancer coming back. Fear of pushing your body and mind too far too soon. Not being sure how your body should feel anymore, what is even ‘normal’? Having lost a sense of control over your life, your body, maybe even over your thoughts. Not feeling safe in your own body, maybe disconnected and a lot of emotions going on underneath the surface.
Maybe you also have all this will, drive and life in you, but your body just isn’t up to the speed and energy just yet. You want to start building, but where to begin? Everything needs to be picked up, organised, started, healed and get going again. But what comes first? And how do you even know what is the right decision to make when there are so many (kindly offered) different and opposing advices and points of view out there?
I know it’s a lot. And you know what, that is ok. It is all allowed to be here all at the same time..
The gratitude as well as the ‘but why!?’.
The excitement as well as the fear.
The drive as well as the feeling of being lost.
The restlessness as well as the exhaustion.
The relief as well as the pain.
You can be powerful and a mess at the exact same time. And that’s such a beautiful paradox. As soon as you surrender to it all, things will slowly start to make more sense. Your intuition and heart will lead you in the right direction. Maybe not right away, it might take more time than you would like (or would expect). But things will clear up and move you forward as long as you stop resisting and fighting it all. I’m here to remind you that it is ok to surrender. It is ok to allow anything and everything to come through just as it needs to. Go ahead and welcome it all with open hands, lots of breathing, softness and love.
You got this my love, YOU GOT THIS.
And if you feel called to have someone on your side while you take on the work of healing and rebuilding, then please don’t hesitate to send me a message. I am here to support you in figuring it all out, to keep reminding you of how truly powerful you are while you build the life you so deeply desire to live. Love you, Lisanne